Friday, October 14, 2011

How to Arrange an Effective Classroom

How to Arrange an Effective Classroom: A practical guide for educational administrators.

As the quarter begins, you must think about the impression you make on your students. The main goal of classroom organization is to make your students as uncomfortable as possible, so that in pain they're driven to focus on what your teachers are saying.

As a note to teachers: Most classrooms are standardized, but it is quite possible to move the furniture back before the next class starts. Just make the students do it.

Step 1. Select a series of hard, plastic, slippery chairs. They may be mismatched if you wish. You may either add extra chairs or subtract chairs; only make sure that the result causes confusion and possible stumbling.

Step 2. Do not put a trash can in the classroom. Rather, place a recycling bin in the far corner under the light. This way, students must stand up and walk all the way to the back of the classroom. Then, they will accidentally drop trash into the bin, realize that it's not a trash bin and suffer the embarrasment of either fishing their trash out or pretending that it actually was trash in the first place.

Step 3. As a general rule, classrooms themselves must be either very small or very large - they both have their advantages. Small classrooms create clausterphobia and cause students to bump into each other. Large classrooms give the students a little workout when they walk up to get papers.

Step 4. Put the clock on the wall behind your students. Not only will they crane their necks, but you will be able to judge when theyre getting bored.

Continue to follow our series with our next article: "How to Create Long Weekends"


Marian said...

Love it! :D

Rebekah Brielle said...

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Hannah said...

Hi Sophia,
This is hilarious :) I was looking at your little bio--I'm gluten-free as wel1!
Looking forward to reading your blog :)

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